Sometimes, it’s the little things. Waking up in the morning next to my best friend, smelling his body spray when he kisses me goodbye as he leaves for work. When he hands me my stuffed bear (Don’t judge. His name is Grizwald and he was one of the first things Danny gave me when we were dating), before he leaves when I’m still in bed. Mostly, it’s the absence of those things that you miss the most. When life gets crazy busy, or you’re stupidly tired, just a little change in the schedule and everything gets all messed up.
Danny gets changed into his uniform at work, so he doesn’t wear his body spray as much in the morning. He works 12 hour shifts, so when he gets home, it’s usually dinner and then bed. Lately, he has been working hella overtime, so it’s even less time at home.
I’ve been told that you just have to deal with it, that’s grown up life. No, I get that. I understand that he works his ass off to provide for us, and if that means that he has to work overtime, great. He loves his job. I love that he has a job that he loves.
What I don’t like, is the disconnect that can happen when you just come home and go to work. When you don’t spend as much time together and you start to take the other person for granted. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy when we get to just chill on the couch and watch tv together.
But, my favorite days are days like today. He doesn’t have to work, there’s no overtime today (He just finished a 7 day in a row stretch) and he got to sleep in. We got to spend time together, we talk and joke and leave each other silly little notes on the chalkboard. We have plans to finally use a gift card we’ve had forever to go to the movies!
So, Danny and I have resolved to date our spouse. Seriously. It’s so easy to start taking each other for granted. This is our way of showing that we still appreciate the other person. It doesn’t need to be an all out date like the flowers and dinner (although that is certainly an idea!). Danny and I like to just hang out together, outside of the house. We go window shopping, walking around town, little things to just spend time together. It’s not about going out every weekend, spending a ton of money or looking for expensive things to do! You can make it once a month, every other weekend, or even every week. It’s what ever works for you!
Here’s a few ideas. Some of these we have done, some we want to do.
- Each of you make a list of the top 10 things you like to do. Take turns doing one for each date night.
- Always classic date night: Dinner and a movie.
- Window shopping. Walk around the mall or your favorite stores and add things to a wish list for your house or a favorite room.
- Take a class together. You can do cooking classes, or painting or even beer making classes. Check out your local arts center for ideas. If you’re short on money, many like ours, will provide scholarships.
- Along those lines, start a new hobby together. Take an advanced (or beginner) cooking class together, or learn to dance!
- Go to one of those wine and painting classes. They provide the paint supplies and a class to paint a canvas image and you provide your own beverage, usually.
- Build a fort in the living room and watch movies all night long. Remember when you used to do that as kids or for your kids? Why let them have all the fun?
- Game night. We love board games. Set up an evening with snacks and one or two board games (you could even buy a new one) that you love to play. If you’re lucky, like we are, we have a place here that rents out board games to try!
- Beer/wine tastings. We have quite a few good wineries around Lawrence, or you could make a day trip to one of the KC breweries to sample the beer.
- Take a day trip. Pick somewhere fairly close to home, within a 2 hour drive. Discover the towns, hit up the hot spots, play tourist! Take a ton of pictures and come home exhausted. 😉
- Swing on the swings at the park.
- Play a game of hide and seek, or tag.
- Bake together. Make a cake, or cupcakes, or bread. You can eat it together later, for dessert.
- Dance. It doesn’t matter if you have moves like Channing or are still doing the sprinkler, just move.
- Have a picnic. It can be in your living room or outside.
It really doesn’t matter what you do, it’s the spending time together that counts. Enjoy each other’s company, and have fun!